All experiences have to be processed; by the intellect, the mind, the emotions, and the body. Much of that takes place at night, through dreams and rest.
However, when we have major experiences, welcome or not, they can take more time to process. We may put aside aspects until we’re ready, especially if it’s difficult. Even very positive experiences can seem overwhelming.
We may have developed the habit of suppressing rather than coming back for completion. This is natural if this is the energetic modelling from our family that we grew up with. We may not have any practice processing the big stuff.
Consider the stress model. When stressed we drop into flight, flight, or freeze. What is your usual response?
Do we lash out at those around us or the apparent cause of our pain?
Do we use escape techniques like TV, drinking, or dulling the body with heavy food? Do we use sugar or caffeine?
Or do we go into overwhelm and become dysfunctional?
Recognizing our usual stress response can help us recognize when we’re stressed or an old issue is coming to the surface. We can be surprisingly dense about stress, as we’ve often habitually keep it unconscious to cope. But the influence is still there in our feeling tone, behaviour, and comfort.
Can we choose instead to feel into what is arising? What is behind our reaction? What is the feeling of the energy driving the behaviour?
For the big stuff, this can take practice. It may be well hidden. We may notice the response but act it out anyway. We may feel into it a bit and go into overwhelm. Or we may find our emotions are just an apparently neutral blank. That means unconscious.
None of this is wrong or bad. This is about making it conscious so we can heal. Allowing what is here to be here as it is.
Some of our unresolved emotions can be from when we were very young. They can feel like our “demons” we’ve kept in the closet. But they’re not so bad when we allow them to arise.
Facing them can bring on a stress response in itself. The big stuff often has many layers of protection and suppression, from each time it came up and was pushed down again, often unconsciously. Now we’re trying to be conscious. If we step into it gradually, we can peel off the layers here and there until we resolve the core.
If we start with the smaller things and learn an effective process for us, we shift our response patterns and stop adding to the pile. This is the magic in getting off the “wheel of karma.” Gradually we’ll be able to tackle the bigger things when they come up. Big healing can occur and weights can be lifted.
I’ve become aware of some massive contractions that have influenced many lifetimes. As one surfaces we can gradually become more conscious and resolve it, bit by bit. As it completes, we don’t have to carry it or live it out anymore.
Be patient with yourself. There are habits to change and deeply entrenched protective measures in place. The ego will feel the status quo is critical to it’s well-being. But the ego’s self-interest is about control, not your well-being. Better to put infinite wisdom in charge by settling back into your true nature.