The path home is a very curious thing. One of the key steps in moving towards the One is to increase the sense of separation.
As we become more conscious, more clear, we begin to have the experience of “witness”, of observer, independent of the observed. To have this experience, we have to step out or back from our individuality, the ego sense. We suspend who we thought we were and discover we are something much deeper, much more profound.
It can be a little disconcerting at first. What we thought real now seems an illusion. Now we have a new “real”, a bigger, deeper real. But one thats really hard to get a handle on. We are so used to experiencing some-thing, its hard to get a handle on experiencing the no-thing, the formless, silent being. It also takes a certain amount of clarity. Very hard to see silence clearly through a foggy mind and heart.
Its almost like it takes practice to be. But not really. Its more a practice of getting out of the way. Of not doing, so we can be. Of allowing. Of not resisting. 1 talk a lot about that here.
And what are we allowing? What is, in a deeper way than anything you can sense. It is not about experiencing. Any experience, even some grand “spiritual” thing is simply some-thing, not being. One can only be being.
In one way, it is the space you notice between what is experienced and awareness. In another way, it is the awareness itself. In another, it is the stuff of what you perceive. Each of these are a way to it.
Even more disconcerting, who we are is included in that growing sense of illusion. Who we thought we were turns out to be a story to explain ourselves, simply because thats what the mind does in the absence of data.
In the same way, when we have an experience or sense of something, the mind will kick in and compare and categorize it. This is normal. Just see it for what it is and don’t take the judgment so seriously. The mind makes a great tool but a poor master. Remember that thought will think about itself a lot. But thought can never understand itself. Understanding always requires a step back, a higher viewpoint.
The mind needs some framework so it can verify its experiences and be satisfied. An unsatisfied mind will tend to dominate attention. Satisfied, we can step past it much more easily. But equally, that framework will be manipulated by the ego to resist that opening. This is the dance of awakening. In the end, any idea of what is beyond mind will become a barrier to being it. No idea is required, just opening.
The deepest truths are unchanging. But how you experience them will continue to change. As you open and get clearer, you will discover a whole series of changing perspectives on the way home. An unending series of ways the One can be perceived.
Some people are lucky. A friend of mines Grandmother woke up. She didn’t want to read about it or understand it. It simply was and that was enough. Were we all so easily OK with just being with what is.
Davidya
Last Updated on November 8, 2018 by Davidya
Davidya –
In ancient India, there was an old saying, “We not human beings with spiritual experience, we are spiritual beings with a human experience” Your post attest to that age old axiom.
Shilpan
Thanks again, Shilpan.
How’ve you been, D? Ironic, is it not, that towards the one there is separation. I’m at a point where I’m in almost constant mourning for lost parts of my Self, but this is not a mournful thing. You give me gems to contemplate, particularly:
“The mind makes a great tool but a poor master.” and “An unsatisfied mind will tend to dominate attention.”
Thanks! I continue to feel wonderful. Growth and opening takes place in cycles. As we step out of the old, there is a phase of separation. This is true of a child pulling back from the parent, the loss of ego, and pretty much any other change shift. We have to leave the old before the new can step in.
The experience you describe is a little different. This arises when we’re awake enough to “remember” the Self but not yet open enough to be it again. Like the sense of separation, its a phase we pass through on the way to wholeness. It helps to drive us forward. So its a good thing. (laughs)