As we climb the ladder of spiritual awakening, the growth cycle has a tendency to speed up and the rules get increasing distinct. Each time there is a major change, the rules of ‘reality’ shift and we again find ourselves relearning how to live. In some ways, the rules are not changing but our habits of being that used to work in illusion stop working.
The cycle of growth: balance, disintegration, growth, integration, and repeat
(Compared to Genpo and Buddhism)
Thus, from a place of relative balance and clarity, we have an opening that leads to some dissolution or disintegration. Sometimes, this can be a little disconcerting. Sometimes, it can be quite disruptive to peripheral aspects of life.
Or at least, what have become peripheral aspects. Like work, relationships, and finance. (laughs) I’ve seen some people disconnect from their life for a time. Some have their external life simply fall apart. This depends partly on how much of a facade it was and how closely it related to what was the ‘true dream’, their life’s loves. When it stops getting the energy of attention, it ceases to exist. And of course, as Adyashanti mentions, when we create a space, karma can rush in for resolution.
A couple of extreme examples I’ve mentioned in the past. Suzanne Segal battled against waking for most of a decade. Genpo Roshi describes the stage before Unity as “Falling from Grace” as he struggled with it for 2 years.
More typical examples are simply residual thinking of a me. Even after the me is gone, it may still be expected to be there by various mental and emotional habits. We act as if, but it’s not, so it doesn’t play correctly. What used to work doesn’t.
Not to emphasize that there will be challenges. Just that there can be, depending on where we are attached. Often, the process is smooth and easy, perhaps with a few bumps in the road. But it’s not unusual to meet a sharp turn at some point. We find ourselves standing in the middle of a field, not sure which way the road even is.
We just have to remember this is a good thing. As the growth completes and integrates, it will all come together and we’ll find ourselves much further along. Like we went into a tunnel that was dark and unclear. But when we come out, we discover we bypassed the entire windy road of the mountain pass.
It’s also worth remembering that these challenges can often take a little more time to process simply because the rules don’t really matter much. We’re enjoying life too much to care if the boss is being weird or money seems to be flying out the door. 😉