I’m struck by how many of the awakening experiences I’ve recently read that were filled with deep challenges. The link to an interview with Byron Katie over at Suffering is Optional, for example. It lead me to Suzanne Segal’s excerpt from her book “Collision with the Infinite“.
What is more notable here is that she had some framework for understanding her experience but rejected it out of hand. This is the trickster, the ego at it’s finest. The ego does not fear death of the body. It can last past that. What it fears deeply is loss of itself, threats to it’s own continued existence. That was the seat of her fear, the loss of identity. Adyashanti calls this the BBQ. Many people struggle with the final letting go. As Adya observes, some who awaken struggle for a little while afterwards as well. Even though the ego has “died” – really its simply an idea that is seen through – there is what I call ego shrapnel, remaining habits of mind that must also be seen through.
It illustrates the value of access to decent teachings. And also of doing the work in advance of waking. All of this makes the whole process much smoother. As I mention in 10 Steps to Enlightenment, there are 10 steps or aspects to the process. Anything we skip along the way is something we just have to deal with later. There may not always seem to be value to the practice. Or there may seem to be an awfully big onion to peel.
In the end though, all we are doing is preparing. It is not the individual who awakes. The individual cannot even conceive it. It is beyond mind. We simply prepare the ground as best we can to allow the Self when the Self comes knocking.
It’s doing a lot of knocking these days.
Davidya
Pingback: The Approach « In 2 Deep
The process is starting to make sense. There is only one Awakening, but many ins and outs throughout. The ego is tricky, just as the Buddha told us. So true, so true.
Hi Tom
Many ins and outs in the process, yes. Nadeen wrote a whole book on the myths to overcome. There is only one awakening from the ego. A switch but a process around that. A before and an after in the integration.
When the Self moves forward and absorbs the heart, there is a second opening. Its not usually called an awakening but is described as another shift in consciousness or a realization. It’s quite distinct from the experience of first awakening as the aliveness is now seen everywhere.
When the Self moves forward and absorbs the lower centers, there is a second waking, a yet higher state described as Unity. The Self is now everywhere. It also has a distinct shift when the entire reality ceases and is seen completely differently. Even the whole identity goes.
Another way to look at them is waking from the dream of individual, the dream of universe, and the dream of God or creation. Only after waking from the whole dream is reality fully seen.
Suzanne described the first and third. She’ll have to continue refinement and pick up the middle. Adyashanti, like some others, jumped forward and did some of each, coming back to integrate them later.
Different teachers reached different levels so have different teachings about the process. This is where the value of old teachings comes in. It gives context to the process that is now becoming more common again.
Pingback: Digesting Genpo « In 2 Deep
Pingback: Ego, Emotions, and Identity: the Person « In 2 Deep
Pingback: Dissolutionment « In 2 Deep
Pingback: An Infinite Crash « In 2 Deep