Understanding Addiction

We all seek to connect with who we really are, and stay connected. That is a place of pure being, of calm, and of balance. This experience is profoundly regulating for our body, mind, and emotions. But when we were young, we may not have had consistent examples of this. We don’t know where or how to look when there’s no reference for it. Thus, we seek outside of ourselves.

Addiction is a natural adaptation when that reference point has not been present. As I’ve written before, we grasp at what we want and resist what we don’t want. Even single-celled organisms show this behaviour. When faced with challenges, we naturally seek a resolution. If we don’t know a way, we seek resolution in other ways.

We all have our adaptations to address our rough spots. Our morning coffee, going for drinks at the end of the week, using spiritual practices to check out, and so forth.

If you don’t think you have any addictions, then you’re a remarkable exception. We live in a culture that encourages addictive behaviour as it’s profitable. If we have a craving, find relief from a behaviour, and cannot stop despite negative consequences, guess what? Eating the entire carton of ice cream may be a soothing behaviour. But is it without side effects? And does it resolve anything? And is this a pattern?

“Quirks” we have, like seeking comfort food, escaping into games, or staying up late, can easily become addictive if they meet an unmet need. Of course, there are degrees of addiction and of harm.

The idea here is not to find things to feel guilty or ashamed of. It’s to become more conscious of behaviours that can be markers for what’s unresolved. More on this shortly.

Substances, gambling, shopping, sex, relationships, food, work, social media, spiritual practices, isolation, information, gaming… addiction can take many forms. There are even collective addictions like consumerism and fear-mongering. The issue is not with these things, but our dysfunctional relationship with them.

“Addictions are a misguided spiritual search for wholeness and individuation.”
– Carl Jung

Society sees some addictions as acceptable and some not. Having a drink, a coffee, or overeating is acceptable. We joke about eating an entire box of chocolates. When I was younger, smoking was acceptable and everywhere. Today it’s become much less acceptable and we shame smokers. People frown upon many drugs and some are even illegal.

Yet none of these are healthy. They’re all ways to meet an unmet need. We wouldn’t behave this way otherwise.

“addiction as the development of coping habits within a social matrix.*”

The basics of addiction are straightforward, but they can be complex. For example, food is a basic need. We develop associations with food early on, like that it represents mother’s care, is a reward, and/or is comforting. Over time, we can find that overeating dulls our painful emotions or helps us to ground. These are less healthy adaptations. And they cover the natural signals the body gives us for what it needs and how much.

I’m not interested in wading into the politics of addiction. This article is about its nature and how we can understand it better.

Treatment
It used to be that addictions were viewed as a choice and moral failing. We dealt with “unacceptable” addictions in the courts and shamed the “perpetrators.” However, our cognitive will has little effect against our lower brain when it feels a survival threat because of an unmet need. Shaming increases the need to escape, making the issue worse.

We then developed a Disease model, which is much more humane and allows medical treatment. 12-step programs are related. Yet while treatment helps get out from under the addiction, it doesn’t resolve the cause. Thus, many will relapse or perhaps shift into a more socially acceptable addiction.

Some drugs don’t have a physical hook for addiction but, like any other on the list, will still have behavioural hooks if they meet an unmet need.

They also created the Four Pillars model. These are: harm reduction, prevention, treatment, and enforcement. This blends the enforcement and medical approaches and may be more acceptable politically. But again, it doesn’t get at the cause.

What is “a neurophysiological explanation for …addictive responses*”?

It turns out trauma causes addiction. Again, trauma is a natural adaption to overwhelming experiences we’ve had in our life. Because it’s an intense experience, we build psychological defences against experiencing it again. But it remains unresolved in our energy physiology. It still burbles away unconsciously, muting our quality of life and influencing our perception and decision-making.

That unresolved pain leads to a need for escape, even if we don’t recognize what it’s from. We’ve carefully hidden our “exiled parts” from ourselves to avoid it. Yet it still drives a need for relief. Thus we’re led to seek regulation by other means. When a substance or behaviour offers a regulated state, even if briefly, we can become hooked. Even if its overall effect is harmful.

Then we can never get enough of what almost works. The nervous system seeks a moment of calm now, as the body only knows now, whatever the long-term consequences.

Sadly, marginalized populations are subject to greater trauma and thus are more likely to fall prey.

“Experiences of oppression lead to trauma, and trauma is the underbelly of addiction. Consequently, marginalized groups are much more vulnerable.*”

Thus, addiction is a substitute for being able to self-regulate. It’s our best attempt to regulate when we don’t know another way.

When very young, we’re built to receive calming regulation from our mother. We co-regulate with her soothing. We learn balance through direct experience. In separating from our mother, we can then internalize that felt sense of safety and can self-regulate, culturing balance and calm.

But if our parents didn’t learn to self-regulate, or could not show us consistently, we didn’t learn. We didn’t develop a sense of centre or calm. And even if we did, a later trauma can throw us out of balance.

All addictions are driven by a dsyregulated nervous system seeking homeostasis, seeking balance. We’re stuck in a fight, flight, or freeze survival response in our nervous system because of trauma, incomplete experiences. We may even ping back and forth between excited and depressed states. Our biological imperative to seek survival through balance trumps any personal will.

“trauma robs us of safety, belonging and dignity. Without these basic needs being met, we seek out quick and dirty ways of soothing to help us survive.*”

The greater the trauma, the more likely an addiction.

So, if trauma is the cause of addiction, we can treat the trauma and resolve the driver of addiction.

Addiction is NOT about the behaviour. That’s the adaptation. Have you ever tried to stop a craving? Shaming and self-judgment only triggers more trauma.

Those in a more suppressed state seek a kick up in something exciting, like stimulants. Those in an overexcited state seek a kick down, like a few beers. In both cases, they seek regulation, a middle ground.

Ironically, the side-effects of addiction can be what drives people to seek real healing. It’s not an easy path, but the long term benefits are considerable.

“The goal is not to feel better but get better at feeling.”
– Michael Brown

When we can feel, we can process those incomplete experiences and resolve the trauma. Then we’re getting at the cause of the behaviour.

However, for more serious addictions, recovery is more involved. We can’t comfortably jump into our unresolved baggage if we don’t have a developed capacity to process it.

We may need rehab to get physically unhooked. Cognitive therapy can help with the triggering shame. And we need a stable living circumstance away from the influence.

Then we have the potential to develop our inner resources and thus have the capacity to process our trauma and heal.

When we’re able to address the trauma, our system shifts from a protective mode into calm and connected naturally. The addictive impulse fades.

Then we’re driven by the flow of life more fully. Calm becomes the norm, we act from our centre, and results come more smoothly. Ahhhh….
Davidya

*Several quotes above are from this article by Jan Winhall.