Choices by Peter OConnor
Choices by Peter O’Connor

Recently, I completed reading my younger son’s latest graphic novel, another over 300 pages. It’s a tale of revenge and forgiveness, of how hate leads to endless strife while love cuts through. The pages touched on many key life lessons.

One is the role of free will. As humans, we’re conscious enough to have choice. Choice is an excellent way to learn, but it brings with it consequences. When we’re driven by darker emotions or reactivity, we’re more likely to upset the balance of the world. Nature automatically works to restore balance, bringing consequence. For every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction. In the east, they call this karma, the play of action.

A trick to learn is how to read what life wants, so we’re not creating unnecessary trouble for ourselves. We notice how life is responding to our actions. Are things unfolding smoothly, or is there resistance and problems cropping up? The greater the harmony with life, the more synchronicities and support we see. Life can shift from a struggle to smooth flow and fulfillment of desires. We call this nature’s support.

When we’re not choosing what life wants, we’ll experience resistance, delays, and unintended negative consequences. This is not a punishment, simply nature taking the most efficient path to restore balance. When we’re in the middle of it, we experience those consequences.

This feedback is a great way to fine tune our direction and priorities. But sometimes, it can take a great deal of experimentation. It may not be obvious at all what life wants, especially if a new chapter is opening and the rules seem to change.

For example, I went through a period where the consulting work I was doing was not being supported. The longer I did it, the more problems cropped up. Even entanglement with clients’ personal problems. However, it was unclear what alternative would be supported. I made a list of options I was aware of and explored each. I then got professional advice. To my surprise, both approaches agreed with my last choice. The signal was strong, and I’d learned enough to trust it, even if I couldn’t see how this was a good choice.

As soon as I took that route, I found out about another option and realized I was in just the right place to pursue it. I quickly found myself in grad school. The registrar’s office said it would take a miracle for everything to come together in time, but it did. I hadn’t even been thinking about school. That study has strongly informed my work since.

This approach takes time and practice to get used to. Especially if we’ve seen a lot of difficulty and non-support. The identified ego seeks to control, whereas this needs letting go. Obviously, this gets much easier after awakening.

We still use our usual objective means for deciding. Only now we’re adding what’s often called feeling or intuition. Heart and mind together.

Our resistance and expectations often impede seeing better choices. As in the above example, we may not see the best option at all. Just take the next best step and see what happens. New options can unfold.

Nature is so much better at organizing for optimal results than we are. It has a much bigger picture and vastly greater resources. Life can become remarkable when we can trust and allow nature to steer the boat.

Consequences (karma) can muddy the waters though. For example, we help a neighbour with something and have a fender bender. The mind may associate the two when one was a good action, and the other was consequences from a much older action. Their only relationship was nearness in time.

We have to discriminate between the old stuff showing up and actual resistance to our current actions. This becomes much easier when we can feel into current events. And that becomes easier when we heal.

Another influence is timing. Sometimes it’s the right choice but at the wrong time. We may have to be patient or even work through a karmic block (of unresolved experience) to restore smooth flow. Again, the key is feeling. Who’s resistance is this? Does it need action to gain momentum? A rest? Healing?

Nature works in the context of the whole, not our personal life. So it supports when the actions will support others, too. It may not seem the optimal time for us, but it actually is, in the bigger picture.

Don’t try to figure this out, as it’s far more complex than we can calculate. However, if we work with nature, we gain the support of that thoroughness.

This is much easier to see in retrospect. Be careful not to get into second-guessing or over-thinking. Feeling is the signal. Allow nature to reveal herself. Follow the bliss.

All of this gets much easier with spiritual growth. The stories of the mind settle, the heart opens, and the “still small voice” can be heard. Perception refines, the mechanics of nature are revealed, and the detached witness comes online. We become observers of the Divine play. The process itself becomes fun, and we let go of concern for certain outcomes. Nature, when supported, can do so much more for us.

Update: I didn’t name the book directly as it hadn’t been commercially available. The original version was colour and very expensive. He converted it to grey-scale and published that. It’s called Cold Heart Beats by Sam Buckland.

Last Updated on July 18, 2022 by Davidya

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    1. Hi RUY
      Sorry, I’ve not studied Spanish. But if I get the jist, you’re asking how to choose when things are not flowing, when the way is not clear.

      This is not uncommon as it may not yet be time to act or there may be some karma to deal with first.

      Over the years, I’ve used various approaches. Jyotish is a good option and they can answer direct questions based on the chart and when the question is asked.

      I’ve also made a list of choices, then researched each to see what went anywhere. That’s what indirectly led me to grad school. I had to put myself in the right place to see the choice. But that meant choosing the least desirable option.

      I’ve also experimented by trying a series of things to see what played out.

      There is sometimes no easy choice. It can be the most difficult one is the best. It can be you have to wait a bit longer before the road opens. Developing the feeling value/ intuition through healing and practice is very valuable here.

      It is the nature of karma to create shadow that obscures the right way. Everyone struggles with this in some area of their life.

  1. Jean

    I’ve thought about this post a couple of weeks ago because my sabbatical is coming to an end and I thought what to do next.
    I’ve pondered if I might work for myself or take another employment but I didn’t come up with a good idea for self-employment. Then I looked for an interesting job opportunity and send the first application. Well they were instantly interested and we both felt it is a good match.
    I think I figured out why the self employment might not be the best option for my long term development. I have a tendency to isolate myself for too long and the employment status will have a lot more opportunities for human interaction. That is my best guess at what life wants at this moment in time from me.

    1. Right, Jean.
      I’m an introvert myself but gradually learned I needed work-life balance and to culture a social life. (A lot of tech work and writing is inherently a solo activity.)

      In your case, the fast and easy response is a great signal it’s the right direction. The key is balance. Getting the interaction through work helps. Relationship is a great way to reveal what remains to be resolved, making it very evolutionary. Yet as an introvert, it’s key to allow me time too. Just not so much that it becomes isolating. It’s a dance.

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