As we progress down the spiritual path, there is an interesting phenomena that occurs. While being deepens, the person become more shallow. In a way, we could say the person devolves as spirit evolves.
The easiest way to explain this is to use a concept from Transactional Analysis. They speak of 3 aspects of the person – the mature Adult, the controller or Parent, and the Child.
Some talk about finding their “inner child“. One side of this is the freedom and openness of innocence, but the child I refer to is the fear driven primitive.
Although it may be bastardizing TA, the idea is that we can think of the ego as the controlling Parent and the identity as the fearful Child.
As we awaken, the controller is exposed and falls away, followed by the various “shrapnel” we have around that. Concepts, beliefs, and so on that have kept us trapped in an idea of being an individual. The ego is a concept, built of concepts.
The ego is energized by emotions such as fear, anger, shame and so forth. With nothing to land on, these are seen more clearly and released.
As this clears off, the divine heart begins to open and the deeper identity is felt and seen. Kind of a deeper version of ego. For many it feels like a nest of primitive fears and needs. A deep grip in the gut. Soon, we wake from the identity of other into oneness. The division of “inside ” and “outside” fall away. Then a series of related core beliefs and needs dissolve with time.
Many talk of peeling the layers of an onion. For many, emotional clearing begins well before waking. The work is already well underway. After waking, seeing is much easier but we may be surprised by what holding is still there. We may feel like we reach the core of the onion, only to find another set of layers.
In some ways, we could say the process does not have an end. (scary thought) But as we clear each layer, the load gets lighter and the vision gets broader. Peace and then happiness begin to show up. The experience of the person becomes less and less prominent until it is overshadowed by bliss and love.
At the same time, this needy gripping continues to show it’s face in places you didn’t know you had. But it’s importance is less and less, so the effects become increasingly minor.
It can be a little like progressing backwards through the layers of holding and fear into original innocence. A devolving of the person into innocent surrender.
Then the inner child that remains becomes the Adult of all.