When a challenge shows up, it can annoy us, disappoint, or trigger fear. It may cause a fight/ flight/ or freeze stress response. This is natural. Just allow this to come up and pass.
Don’t try to solve the problem while you’re still reacting. Let things settle out first. If we dwell on our reactions, we’re creating resistance to the circumstance. This does not encourage resolution – of the emotion or the problem.
Problem solving means creativity, big picture, and stepping back. I wrote previously about Mark’s approach. It’s always more difficult if we’re constraining ourselves. If we can accept the situation as it is, we’re much more likely to sense the pattern and find the solution.
Circumstances can often arise to balance and resolve actions of the past – what the ancients called karma. Again, resisting doesn’t lead to resolution and the pattern will show up again and again until it can complete. Better to deal with it now.
Acceptance here doesn’t mean condone. You don’t have to like or want the challenge. If it’s nasty, you have good reason to be angry or frustrated. But seeing the circumstance clearly means seeing it as it is. Accepting means seeing what is. Resisting seeing impedes seeing solutions.
This is the dance of allowing circumstances to arise however they do while seeking a resolution to those things we don’t want. This can be difficult at first if the challenge is personal. Aging parents, for example, especially if we’ve never established an adult relationship with them. The caveat Mark makes is to make sure it’s your problem before you try to solve it. Or in a case like the example, separate out what’s your problem and what’s your aging parents.
Everything has a resolution and thus every problem has a solution. But if the issue serves a purpose, then the problem may be in our perception. Wanting what we need to go away isn’t helpful.
As we step off the habit of resistance, we wind down the frequency of challenges and our perception of life events as a problem. Circumstances settle and life gets simpler.
In a healing video, Dorothy Rowe said going through a difficult period is your personal offering to the collective. By resolving our part of the collective load, we support the whole. We also offer a living example to the whole that makes it easier for others to do the same. This helps dedicate the collective to evolution.
The perspective you take or the way you frame life can make a big difference in how enjoyable it is for you. The materialist perspective sees the universe as a giant machine run by fixed laws of nature. This can be a handy way to see mechanisms objectively. But it doesn’t serve us well personally as it renders life pointless and disposable.
Yet when you see the deeper mechanics and recognize we’re all here experiencing life because we each bring a unique experience to the whole, you come to see that life is unfolding as it should and we’re all contributing. Our very life is our purpose. Life has so much meaning, it takes all of us to unfold it.
If we love the problem as it is, it will offer us its resolution. If the circumstance has a purpose, the resolution may take time and it may not be easy. But loving whatever life brings us is the higher path, the path of solutions, the path to peace and happiness, the path home.