Many people I know on a spiritual path have discovered a recurring theme in their life. They may even discover it goes back thousands of years. They find ongoing reason to feel angry or abandoned or guilty or unheard or similar.
The odd thing is, this comes from a story that’s driven by unresolved trauma going back to an ancient fall in consciousness. We’re finally in a time where that story can be seen and released.
Meantime, we continue to inflict ourselves with this theme. We may find ourselves amplifying circumstances that arise normally but relate to the story. See! People deserve my wrath! Or we set ourselves up to experience them. For example, we push people away or act out to experience abandonment. Or we speak obscurely or rudely to ensure we’re not being heard. We all have our favorite patterns.
This makes no sense when it’s seen directly. But because this story is wrapped up in our identity, we feel more secure in inflicting familiar pain on ourselves than we do in seeing through the story. We might call it a distraction from our inner disconnection and pain.
It comes down to the lost me. We’ve lost our sense of connection with the Divine, so we grasp at our ego sense and identify with our separateness. The ego sustains a false front and stories to give an illusion of personal security. And yet the ego knows it’s false, so it heavily defends the charade. It creates pointless drama to protect the false self-story.
Modern 24-hour TV News embodies this. It’s devolved into opinion and commentary, often fearful projections of what might happen. Actual “news” is mostly a litany of what’s wrong and who’s to blame. Why do people watch this noise? Because it’s self-confirming. It reflects how many people think.
But when we discover who we are beneath that, we can let it go, along with all the constructs that supported the story and the false security of a lost me. This is the most challenging part of waking up. We have to surrender enough to see through this noise and recognize who we are within.
If we have the self-honesty to observe our reactivity, we can follow it back to repeated themes and heal. This makes an immense difference in quality of life.