In a number of spiritual and religious traditions, there is the role of Bhakti or devotion. The path of the heart. Usually, it is presented as a devotion to God or a representative of God such as Jesus. In the east, it may also take the form of the guru.
But there is another form of devotion that is more natural for some people. They feel a greater sense of intimacy and connection with their mate as the beloved.
This is not the emotional love of romance and infatuation. That is temporary and wanes. It also has a quality of attachment or possessiveness to it that is the hallmark of ego. What we’re talking about here is beyond that.
When the Self moves forward and absorbs the heart, the crust falls away and a divine love emerges, flowing out and seeking an object of devotion. We are no longer looking for love but rather seeking a place to give it. With a ‘me’ no longer present to want things, life steps into a path of service.
Seeing the mate as the god/goddess can be a profound spiritual practice. But a few things would be in place for this to happen.
– Resonance – there would be a deep resonance with the other person where they draw out our silence. Spending time with them is like a meditation in itself.
– Acceptance – there would be a mutual acceptance of this process, an engagement. While the other party may not have reached this capacity yet, they need to allow it.
– Respect – there would be a profound respect for the object of attention.
– Love – and of course, there would be the love that can only arise in an open undefended heart. What we may call Divine Love.
We could also list things like trust, support, and devotion, but these are assumed when there is that profound flow.
When this flow is established, it is a love that does not end. Even if the form or relationship falls away, they have served as the gateway to the divine. Once the flow falls back into itself, we connect with the never ending cycle, the flow of love within itself.
I have seen this as the vehicle into Unity, the bridge of love into wholeness. It can also be the path of forever deepening surrender. Just as the great sages speak of their devotion to the master, so too one’s mate is raised to divinity.
A friend of mine suggested this would be one of the natural outgrowths of the massive awakening happening now. Some talk of the guru showing up at the right time. In the same way, one’s beloved can arrive when the true heart beckons. Not because they are needed but because it’s time for the loop to complete.
Relationship columns will never be the same.
Davidya
Last Updated on April 8, 2014 by
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Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! Someone finally wrote this blog. It is so important to point out (especially in our culture)that this is a natural outpouring for some. In my experience, when the root is absorbed and travels up to the heart, the nature of the energy elicits aliveness, bliss and orgasmic essence to all parts of the the bodybeingmind. What I discovered is that what I am (at this point) wants merger or union with the Divine Lover.
Deep Bow of Appreciation!
Hi Ben!
Yes, some people describe things like an enlivenment of our sensuality, closely tied to our feelings. The awakening of passion. Whole-body orgasms or orgasms of the heart and body both. Feeling connected with ones lover even at a distance…
And yes, a drive to merge with the divine. It gets even better when the divine descends. 😉
Exactly! How cool! I did not know this was so common. I only know 2 people like me in this. I have a much increased sensuality tied to my feelings, whole body orgasms often kicked of by feelings from the heart.
Is there any more information or references you could pass along for a deeper dive into all this?
What a relief!
In Heartitude!
Yes, when the heart is connected, that’s what leads to a much deeper experience. I have no idea how common it is. It’s not your usual casual conversation. But of course one wants to find partners who are in this space too.
The resources I’ve found have been random snippets from others. The idea of the upaguru, for example.
There are some authors out there who spoke to this, like Rumi.
Tantra is a spiritual practice that uses sex as a small aspect of a spiritual journey to unity. But western teachers of tantra are often focused on the sexual aspects. Partly this is because westerners often have issues to be healed in that arena. But there tends to be be an emphasis on good sex alone. Without the heart context, the depths are missed.
This points to another common issue in western spirituality. Many people use pursuit of the light to avoid the darkness. They suppress their lower energies and focus on the upper ones, not realizing they won’t find integration and growth in avoidance. I spoke about the subject here:
https://davidya.ca/2010/03/30/healing-the-animal/
A friend of mine observed that spiritual centers are often full of single women. But many of them are pretty ambivalent about relationship. Men often fare worse, having done less heart work.
People talk about the difficulty of becoming enlightened. Healing ourselves is probably the actual difficult part. (laughs)
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