There is a subtle but profound difference between simple acting and efforting. Hawkins called this Power vs Force. Our culture celebrates individual effort but does not discriminate between these. The result is many people trying to control and force things, largely leading to frustration, anger, and other forms of suffering.
The key is action, but learning to be in the flow or current. Learning to work with nature rather than against her. Sometimes we have to dial up the power, but only to move through. If we instead try to force our way through nature, we push against an obstacle that may actually be trying to support or protect us.
Think of trying to lift something very heavy. Do we try to force it to move or thrash at it? Or do we use principles like leverage or get others help and work together?
Ironically, force pits us against the flow of nature, which is pure love. We’re also pushing against what is, which is non-acceptance and also leads to suffering.
It takes some observation and practice to get used to this. And to break some old bad habits.
While certainly we should put energy and attention into our goals, this sense of force and control is ego driven. The tendency can also be more deeply driven by an unresolved trauma that creates beliefs we express energetically. Those then play out in our lives. We may have a meme of not deserving, for example, so we unintentionally call forth people and events that will prove it, reinforcing the belief. Or perhaps we believe people can’t be trusted. And yet it’s only true because we’re making it so.
Also, at an early age we’re often programmed with and pick up various subtle “Shoulds” and “Musts”. Some of those are useful, like not hitting or biting. But some are less useful, like real boys don’t cry. Or good girls should be seen and not heard. Learned at an early age they become rules we carry forward unconsciously into adulthood.
Ironically, as we make good spiritual progress, we can become better manifestors. This also means we’ll also express our shadow memes more effectively too. But with enough awareness, we’ll recognize the dynamic and follow the feeling back to it’s source. Once the source is conscious, it’s often very easy and quick to resolve. Some of the bigger knots may have to be unpacked more, but this creates a huge improvement in quality of life.
And of course as we become less reactive, we stop creating new karmas too.
Some of this resolution can occasionally lead to a persons life changing markedly or the old falling apart in unexpected ways. The old karma/ energy impulse is resolved and so the need of those people and circumstances in our life ends. We enter a new chapter. Other times, life continues as before but our relationship with it changes. We shift from resistance to acceptance, then gratitude. Old hurts shrivel and fade, leaving us with peace, then happiness.
This commentary flows out of an an interview I recently listened to on BATGAP. A local woman named Kiran, Mystic Girl in the City that I finally got to listening to after Rick mentioned he plans to interview her again this month.
In the interview, she mentions that pain is effort [resistance] – so move to effortless. She outlined 4 points in healing, here briefly summarized from the video:
1 – Awareness = effortless. Be aware of internal stuff, how you feel.
2 – Acceptance – of what arises. A warm welcome, love. Just as you are, all of you. Cherish all of it. Don’t belittle feeling good.
3 – Healing – all things return home. Love = dominant current – but need to touch it, then we’re pulled into the flow and can process whatever arises. Touch the pain with love.
4 – Alignment – standing in Yes, creativity. Guided moment to moment, what’s the most delicious thing to do now.
Her web site offers a book that goes into this process in much more detail. I’ve not read the book but if you’ve been reading this blog, you know that I’ve touched on all of these points in various ways. These are very useful principles to use in our lives.