It is fascinating to see the depth to which we can go with allowing, with letting it be as it is.
When we first begin on the path, we are long used to doing to accomplish. Pushing forward toward our goals. Gradually, it becomes clear that the spiritual path is not so much about doing but rather about allowing. Of letting it be as it is.
This process gradually clears the way and the observer begins to emerge, the independent witness. At some point the allowing reaches a greater depth and we surrender to what is in the moment and awaken.
From the loss of ‘me’ with awakening, the knots on the heart are untied and the crust falls away. As love begins to flow, it surpasses the prior bliss and a much deeper value of surrender unfolds. The deeper mechanics of life appear before us, including how consciousness moves into form. God Realization dawns.
This process unites subject and object in Oneness and Unity is realized.
With each shift in consciousness, there is also a related shift in perspective or vantage. The witness of awakening detaches us from involvement in action. The depth of feeling opens the depths of reality. Finally, from the steps of Unity, we can shift from viewing inside creation blossoming out, to being the depth of totality collapsing in.
From totality, creation does not bloom forth. The Totality collapses into a point. The flow is the movement of collapse, of surrender. Reality is found to be a perpetual surrender of Self to Itself, a flow of devotion that collapses into the cosmic intelligence that creates the appearance of our world.
Beyond bliss is divine love. Beyond divine love is devotion. To be the master, you have to be the disciple.
This is quite profound on a number of levels. For example, it means true intention is a surrender, not a push. Thus the need to let go. As your existence is a point in totality, you are a surrender to yourSelf, you are an intention. Samyama is a surrender. Life is a devotion.
Davidya
Last Updated on May 21, 2014 by
I thought the later levels would make me excited, but I feel total peace about them. Beauty.
“From the loss of ‘me’ with awakening, the knots on the heart are untied and the crust falls away.”
That’s such a beautiful way to put it. I like the usage of the word ‘crust’ here. Very appropriate.
“Finally, from the steps of Unity, we can shift from viewing inside creation blossoming out, to being the depth of totality collapsing in.”
Yeah, so weird. It’s like consciousness is in reality and reality is within consciousness, yet there is no inside or outside because it’s all one. A trip for the mind! Logically an impossible paradox, but it’s what is. 😀
“As your existence is a point in totality, you are a surrender to yourSelf, you are an intention. Sanyama is a surrender. Life is a devotion.”
So helpful. Thank you for this, and for your other posts Davidya. 🙂
Hi Ariel
Thanks for the feedback. You are quite welcome.
Yes, first the knots are released, resistance is let go. Thus the heart opens. Then perception refines and the crusts may literally be seen. As the crusts fall away, the divine heart is revealed and love just spills out everywhere. (laughs)
Some teachers emphasize that awakening is not the goal. It is not the complete perception of reality. Rather remarkable as we can go very deeply into this, the entire mechanics of everything. But it turns out to be the mechanics of the dream, not the underlying reality. Only in Unity, when duality collapses, when all falls into the one, is the real process gradually revealed. And quite curiously, it’s almost the exact opposite. (laughs)
I’ve seen a few scientists talk about ‘implosive force’. Most of western science being based on ‘explosive’, which is why we don’t understand gravity. It is the implosive version of electromagnetism. One force outgoing, the balancing force incoming. The other forces are derivations of same at a different scale. Thats the jist of it at least.
It is remarkable to see that letting go is not really the ‘extra’ detail in intention or law of attraction. It is the actual mechanism that underlies the world of apparent form. It is the collapse of infinity that invites form.
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Ariel has a new post, linked above, where another layer opens and ones expectation of what is is expanded yet again. Often, we may think we have reached some ultimate but then it becomes apparent that there is always more love, more depth, more peace. Infinite is just that 😉
Hi Davidya,
This has got to be the clearest description of surrender I have ever read. Thanks to Ariel for the link.
I love this part…
“The depth of feeling opens the depths of reality. Finally, from the steps of Unity, we can shift from viewing inside creation blossoming out, to being the depth of totality collapsing in.”
This was very helpful to me since I have a strong feeling sense.
I have never heard anyone describe the process as implosion. I have had to read that a number of times. That is actually helpful because it creates an opening in consciousness that wasn’t there before. I have always been drawn to surrender or allowing. I have not found many people who can really even describe it.
I was actually expecting an explosion or an expanding widening of openness outward where consciousness extends outward. The mindbody becomes more aware. I never considered it a collapsing in.
The descriptions I have read of expanding consciousness or awareness and this one of collapsing inward is a bit confusing. So, are you saying the allowing or collapsing inward actually leads to the opening to the totality that is all, but is normally described as outward?
Namaste,
Ben
Hi Ben
Welcome. Glad you related. I try to surrender in writing too. This way, Self speaks through the person and its more complete. I often learn something myself. (laughs)
I also have a strong feeling sense but I had to unbury it. I used to be very in the head.
Yes, the implosion aspect is less commonly described. What’s important to understand is that, for most people, awakening is in stages. First awakening and things approaching it are indeed an expansion. We step out of the small me and into the infinite being.
God realization is also an expansion but one begins to step into the details more too. That’s a kind of lesser implosion.
But when you step out of creation altogether, you step into the reverse perspective. You are now the infinite looking back on expression. You are not witnessing inside creation, you are awareness encompassing it. From that point it is not the person expanding to infinity, it is the infinity collapsing into the person. The infinity surrendering its vastness. Although in another way, it doesn’t really. Like a hologram, all of infinity remains within the point, the person.
Thinking about this further, one can say surrender itself is a kind of collapsing that may lead to an expansion or an implosion. We fall into the point and become the infinite. Most people don’t experience it quite that clearly though – just the surrender and the expansion. The process is easier to grasp – oo mind word – easier to understand in retrospect.
Many teachers don’t talk past first awakening to avoid confusion but from what I’ve seen, if you don’t know it’s there, you won’t look. Some teachers have not gone further themselves. This discussion clearly illustrates the value – the actual mechanics of reality are not apparent until much further along. Awakening is just the beginning.
It’s also worth observing that our concepts about awakening have nothing to do with it. The me does not awake. Self awakes to Itself. This is why people talk of grace. Its also why our concepts can be the last barrier to surrender.
I really appreciate the pointers Davidya. A lot happens these days that I don’t understand.
I really want some help with all this.
I have had the experience of openness and just watching everything arising and going Wow! Everything is given.
I wondered if this bodymind was included in the openness? I just left that as an open question, and then got a glimpse that I was the openness.
Then, that more or less settled down.
Some time later…
I had the really scary experience of everything being a hologram. That is a great word for it. It scared the delights out of me for everything to be known and seen as a hologram totally empty … a movie image projection. That was totally unexpected. It was creepy. The mind was stopped. I saw how I have no control. The mind overlays its sense of being in control.
This implosion of Totality is not something I can say has happened in this case…. yet.
THIS is having its way with me (this bodymind).
Very much like you, I am having to unbury my feeling sense. I became willing to start that yesterday after reading this blog entry. I have relied on my mind soooo long it is taking big trust to allow the feeling sense to surface. I say trust, but really I don’t have a choice I feel.
With this feeling sense comes the feelings I have spent a life time burying I saw yesterday. So, I am following something Ariel wrote about. When something comes up I just say Yes to it openly and honestly. If I am afraid then I say Yes I feel frightened. I just honestly admit where I am. Then I add, I am going to face everything, I can’t turn back. I don’t want to. I don’t try to fix it. I let it all remain an open raw sense.
Thank you so much for helping me Davidya. You are correct many teachers are not guiding past the initial awakening. Although a few appear to be trying to find a way.
It really helps to have fallen off the cliff and have someone holding my hand as I collapse.
Deep Bow of Gratitude!
Ben
Hi Davidya,
I definitely related, and I am learning a lot from my writing these days.
I will amend what I wrote. I have a strong feeling sense. It is alive, but definitely needs uncovering as I have been very thought oriented. I got real good at it especially in the spiritual circles until…
i got to the point where i could not strap on another belief system, spiritual practice, read a book, attend a work shop, or pontificate platitudes from my chosen platform. Seriously, I got sick of it all especially the part where I was engaging. i had no choice. i had to give it all up because it was driving me nuts, and it felt so empty and leading to no where. So, that is the context.
You are striking some major chords of resonance here. i had no idea what was going on. i attended some Satsangs, and read some nondual writings. i was drawn there, and i wanted down to earth every day talking about it. If it got too intellectual, it became too much.
Around 6 months Ameeta struck a chord with me in her writings. I followed the resonance. After an exchange i saw everything as arising and falling in openness. It seemed like everything is given. Work and life just flowed. Everything just happened without my effort or involvement.
i wondered if this mindbody was included in this openness. A day or two later I had a glimpse that I am the openness which made the question seem silly. That experience passed as well.
Then i had an experience of everything being illusory. It was like everything was a hologram. Great word. It frightened me. I have no idea what to do with that.
So the collapsing speaks to me because i am so not in control of what happens. My mind can’t understand it. It helps to have some guidance and conversation because this is new and very unexpected.
Thank you!
Ben
Hi Ben
Thanks for the feedback. As I mentioned to Eric on another post, the less me that’s there and the more Self, the more the post is you hearing your true Self so the more you can potentially relate.
Thank you for sharing your journey. Our culture has little framework for our path, so it can seem we walk it alone. But there have been many, many who have come before us. Many who are much clearer about it. This is not a journey into more aloneness, it is a journey of joining, into Oneness.
Very good experience of a deeper view of reality. Some call that being the witness or independent observer, watching life play out without your doing. The hologram you mention is what some call the Maya or illusion. I talk about that a lot here. The key thing is to separate the experience and the response. There is an experience of another way of seeing the world, and there is the reaction.
These kinds of things can cause fear reactions for several reasons. For one, what we thought was real turns out not to be. Shaking our reality up can be unsettling. Secondly, the ego likes to be in control. When the ego sees it may loose control (which is an illusion, as you’ve seen), it will throw up drama and fear to distract. It does not want the reality to be seen as if it is fully seen, ego will end. Sometimes, it can take a little doing to unhook the ego. And thirdly, a profound spiritual experience can cause purification, a release. This can sometimes have emotional content.
The key thing to understand is that it’s just an experience. It’s a way to learn a little more about whats going on. But as i talk about here, just allow. It’s OK. The release will clear, the experience will integrate, and the ego will settle. A deeper understanding will emerge from it, preparing you for the next step.
And then another cycle will begin. Disintegration, growth, integration, and repeat.
The implosion of totality is a much later experience usually. On this site, I go Deep, hence the title. I talk not just about awakening but about several stage of awakening, into advanced levels of unity as touched on in this article. This is well beyond stepping towards first waking. But not always (laughs)
Yes, men especially have this need to do conscious heart work. It’s a profoundly valuable process. I would not say “remain an open raw sense”. If you can be fully open with it and allow it, it will come up and release, no remain. Although it may reveal yet another layer to it to allow. But you’ve got the right idea. Just watch out the ego doesn’t try to own it. Say “oh look how spiritual I’m being. Look how raw I feel” etc. Then it tries to take control and it stops.
Interestingly, fear is good. Deep fear tells you your getting near the root as all “negative” emotions arise from fear. But look behind the fear. at the bottom of the fear is peace and joy.
There’s also an even deeper release method I don’t think I’ve talked about. When you can see your resistance, it’s possible to directly break it up without going into it as much. References like the crust above are seen or directly sensed.
Be patient with yourself. Remember that you’ve been collecting this resistance for a very very long time. It will take time to be seen and cleared. And it will get increasingly abstract and primal. But the farther in you go, the more things can flow better. The more the light and bliss can come through. And then the love. Love that will come to absorb everything.
Yes, there comes a point in the path where we have to shed our beliefs. Step out of the box. Let go what has guided us. This can be hard if we’ve been in a structured spiritual community.
But don’t worry. It’s a stage of release. Then when you find the truth inside, you can find it outside again. But now without boundaries.
Again, just consider it an experience, a different perspective. It will get deeper and fuller until you awake from the hologram. Nothing needs to be done. The process here is one of allowing. Being OK with what is. Taking it as it comes.
It’s not about the mind. The process is taking place beyond mind, so mind cannot explain it. Understanding comes after. Any concepts you may build about it will be wrong as mind can never conceptualize who you are. That’s not it’s job. Minds not supposed to be in charge.
Funny thing about awakening. It’s never what we expect. But it’s ordinary, normal. Nothing changes, yet everything does. (laughs)
Dunno if this helps, but there it is.
That was very helpful. Thank you!
especially this part
“the less me that’s there and the more Self, the more the post is you hearing your true Self so the more you can potentially relate.”
this…
“just watch out the ego doesn’t try to own it. Say “oh look how spiritual I’m being. Look how raw I feel” etc. Then it tries to take control and it stops.”
and this…
“Again, just consider it an experience, a different perspective. It will get deeper and fuller until you awake from the hologram. Nothing needs to be done. The process here is one of allowing. Being OK with what is. Taking it as it comes.”
and this…
It’s not about the mind. The process is taking place beyond mind, so mind cannot explain it. Understanding comes after. Any concepts you may build about it will be wrong as mind can never conceptualize who you are.”
Thanks again!
Ben
You’re welcome.
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